Her Kind of Love
by Claudi Skies
Summary: Although they've been "together" for a while now, it takes more near-death situations, sporadic investigations, and careful contemplations for Eren to finally realize just what exactly his relationship with Mikasa entails. Sequel to "Live in the Moment." Opens with the events of Chapter 49. EreMika with hints of Yumikuri, Sasha/Connie, & as always, Levi/his cleaning supplies.
1. Grin

**Here we go! Although it's not really necessary to read "Live in the Moment" before jumping into this sequel, I hope any new readers will choose to read it first in order to set the full context for this fic and provide you with all the background information regarding Eren and Mikasa's current relationship. To all returning readers, thanks for giving this a shot! Huge thank yous to kiks493, Sentinel07, and blackdragonhuntress for being so supportive and encouraging! :) I have yet to decide the length of this, but I anticipate more chapters than there were in the prequel. Rated T for language and violence.**

**Opening up with Chapter 49 means huge spoilers for those who don't follow the manga and that shit is going down. A major bulk of this first chapter features canon dialogue from the manga, but I will be taking more liberties in the rest of the story. Nothing fluffy here, but I promise there will be enough to go around later! Without further ado...**

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**Her Kind of Love**

**Chapter 1: Grin**

"Commander Erwin!"

Startled and petrified cries came from all directions as the soldiers of the Survey Corps beheld the gruesome sight of the right arm of their admirable and seemingly invulnerable commander trapped between the jaws of a Titan that had charged at their formation with alarming speed. It had happened so suddenly and unexpectedly that no one had been able to react quickly enough to engage it. There was a sickening crunch, and all they could do was watch in uninhibited horror and abject disbelief. Blood poured out from the wound, splattering his uniform and everything within a two-foot radius.

The disturbing sight of the symbolic Wings of Freedom splashed with crimson was a grim reminder that the price of freedom was a heavy one.

He was visibly shaken himself and cringing in pain, but he had only one objective in mind at the moment and it took precedent over everything else—including his own life if it came down to it. There was no hesitation whatsoever.

"ADVANCE!" Erwin bellowed, his voice unwavering and eyes flashing with slightly crazed determination. "Eren's right before your eyes! Advance!"

Mikasa didn't need to be told twice; even if he hadn't issued such an order, she would have proceeded on her own and fought against anyone who got in her way. She barely noticed the few soldiers who stayed behind to aid their commander.

Eren was right in front of them, so close that she could sense his distress and rage, and he _needed_ her. From the glimpse she had caught of him before she and the others had been forced to abandon their first try to reclaim him, he was gagged, tied to Bertolt's back, and held captive by Reiner in his Armored Titan form. Furious tears stung her eyes and clouded her vision as she recalled all of the past instances when she had nearly lost him. Last time, it had been in the Forest of Giant Trees, but with the Lance Corporal's help, they had managed to recover him without any further casualties. But this time… as soon as instinct had warned her that he was in danger, circumstances had intervened and given the enemies a five-hour head start. She had woken up from the impact feeling disoriented, distraught, and alone, even with Armin's usually soothing presence.

And that was what scared her the most—more than any of these Titans storming towards them, more than losing other comrades, and even more than death. She had vowed to never stop fighting and give up again, so as long as she had Eren by her side, there was nothing she could possibly be afraid of. He was never going to die before her, not on her watch.

Perhaps it was a reckless and overly confident thought, but that was how much she loved him.

Gritting her teeth, Mikasa gripped her unsheathed blades tightly and urged her horse to go faster as they dodged the large open palm of an incoming Titan. Left and right, her fellow soldiers were being snatched up, trampled over, or directly eaten from their saddles. But she couldn't afford to dawdle in an attempt to save them; she couldn't afford to care about any of them when the person whose life she held in greater value than her own was not within her reach. She meant what she had said to Krista when the petite girl had begged her to spare Ymir's life. They were comrades, _friends_ even, but no one would see any mercy from her when Eren's life was at stake.

_"Asking me for compassion is mistaken. After all, I have no heart or time to spare. Krista…Eren and Ymir. Which will it be? Will you get in my way as well?"_

On either side of her, Hannes and Jean were tailing closely with their blades drawn. Dark eyes narrowed dangerously as she zeroed in on her targets—Reiner was preoccupied with the task of fighting off the massive crowd of Titans that Erwin had strategically lured to the scene, leaving Bertolt and Eren exposed. This was her chance. Swiftly assuming a crouched position upon her still galloping horse, she kicked off the saddle and launched upwards with the help of her activated gas mechanism. Arranging the blades in her hands, Mikasa took a second to aim before firing the grapple hook towards the Armored Titan's chin, where the two humans were tucked under and stayed in place with the help of Bertolt's grapple hook.

The taller boy uttered a noise of surprise as her hook embedded itself a mere inch or two above his head. Eren's eyes widened as a wave of relief flooded through him—she came back for him! He hadn't doubted her, but just a short while ago she hadn't been able to successfully rescue him due to Ymir's interference and Reiner's protection. He watched attentively as she swung towards them, noting the murderous intent on her face and the blades in her hands poised to strike. Visibly panicking, Bertolt acted upon instinct and leaped away just in time, narrowly missing Mikasa's vicious and precise swipes.

His gaze never leaving her form, Eren struggled against the restricting binds and made a futile attempt to bite through the cloth serving as a gag. Sudden movement from behind her caught his attention, and at that moment, he wished he could be anywhere but here, helplessly watching the horrifying and torturous scene unfold before him. Reduced to only being capable of making muffled frantic sounds that she couldn't even hear, he had never loathed himself more.

Still recovering from the smarting blow that she had missed yet again, Mikasa became aware of the grave predicament she was in just as the Titan's hand closed around her torso. Gasping in shock and squeezing her eyes shut, she cried out as she felt the bones comprising her ribcage fracture, her features sharply contorting to reflect the extreme amount of pain she was experiencing. A century seemed to pass by as her agonizing shrieks persisted; the stark realization that she might die was the only coherent thought in the midst of her suffering.

That, and _Eren_. He wasn't even safe yet—she _couldn't _die. Would she never be able to hold him in her arms again?

"Mikasa!"

* * *

His ears were deafened by her blood-curdling screams, his eyes were brimming with vengeful tears, and his breaths were shallow and unsteady. He was sweating profusely, not because of the harsh sunlight nor the unwanted body heat radiating from the person behind him, but in sheer cold terror. This couldn't possibly be real—she was _Mikasa_, the strongest in their class and one of the most valued soldiers in the Survey Corps! It was nearly impossible for her to get caught like that, not when she was so agile and skilled with her 3DMG and swords. And yet, here she was. He knew that she wasn't invincible; he had told her that himself. But to actually witness her slip up and reveal that she was susceptible to physical harm as well was deeply upsetting.

And it was all his fault. She was at such a disadvantage because of _him_. Was he going to be forced to relive that infamous day and lose her as well?

_"The world is cruel."_

Why was he thinking of her words now?

"Shit! You bastard!"

As Bertolt quickly reeled them back to rest on Reiner's left shoulder, Eren didn't need to see the person to know who he was. He had never thought the day would come for him to actually be _happy_ to hear horse-face's irritating voice. From his unfavorable position strapped to Bertolt's back, he could only see what was happening from out the corner of his eyes. He turned his head as far as he could to assess the situation, his aching heart hammering wildly in his chest and entire body heating up in pure, unadulterated resentment. He was torn between wanting to block out her tormented cries and finding a way to break free from this bastard so he could slaughter that creature. And then kill those repulsive, two-faced _traitors_. _Murderers_. But, dammit, he was stripped of his 3DMG, so even if he decided to go with the latter, he wouldn't achieve anything.

He had never felt more powerless.

Fuck, he couldn't lose her. He _couldn't_. She was important. Too important—and _still_ in the clutches of that fucking Titan…where the fuck was he?!

Eren would never admit it if anyone asked, but deep down he knew that if he had to trust one person to save Mikasa's life in the event he couldn't do it himself, that person would be Jean.

"Let go of her!" Said boy's enraged yell ripped through the air as he confronted the Titan, shooting his grapple hook and swinging himself out of his saddle. Soaring straight towards the Titan's face, Jean ruthlessly stabbed its left eye.

Suddenly extremely grateful for Jean's existence, Eren released a shaky breath as he watched the Titan's grip around Mikasa loosen. His vision was abruptly obscured as Reiner's arm moved to protect Bertolt from other advancing members of the Survey Corps, jostling both of them and spiking Eren's already boiling anger.

"We finally made it all this way!" The usually soft-spoken boy announced, although there was an audible nervous hitch in his voice. "We're taking Eren back with us! Back to our hometown!"

The gray-eyed boy listened in silent fury, dismay, and dread. Where the hell was this "hometown" anyways? And there was something about the future of this world...a monkey... Shit, at this rate everyone was going to die! All because he got captured…_Mikasa_. Was she safe and on the way to getting her injuries treated yet?

"Bertolt!" A voice that Eren knew almost as well as his own rang out.

_Armin!_

The blond boy jumped into his line of vision, crouching by the juncture of the Armored Titan's neck and shoulder. He appeared to be carefully pondering his next course of action, his expression bleak and blue eyes swirling with various emotions. Eren felt Bertolt tense as a slightly deranged look of enlightenment crossed Armin's face.

"Is it really okay…" Armin began slowly in a dark tone, "for the two of you to leave your comrade behind and return to your hometown like this?"

Bertolt sucked in a sharp breath, and Eren would have voiced his surprise as well if it weren't for the gag. What exactly was Armin trying to say? He trusted his best friend and knew without uncertainty that the blond always figured out the best solution to any situation, but that look—that was something Eren had never seen before on such a pure and honest face. It was devious, unforgiving, and didn't suit Armin in the least.

What had this fight for humanity done to him…to all of them?

"You're going to leave Annie behind?" The brainiest of the trio pressed on without missing a beat, seemingly unaffected by the astonished faces before him. He stared hard at one of the said girl's accomplice. "She's deep underground now, in the northernmost Utopia District…being _tortured_."

Eren could have sworn that the boy behind him stopped breathing. He knew for a fact that what Armin was saying wasn't true—it was a bluff. But for a second there, he had almost believed the words that were said with so much conviction. So why…?

"If you could hear her screams, you'd understand immediately. Even if the physical wounds can heal, there's no way to erase the pain. Great care is being taken so that she won't die, but even at this moment, Annie's body hasn't had any time to rest yet."

_What the hell, Armin?_ A flurry of questions flew through Eren's mind, and fear for his childhood friend's safety as well as sanity consumed him. What was he trying to accomplish?

"She's undergoing all sorts of ingenious methods of torture…" The blond boy trailed off ominously, a mad glint still evident in his bright calculating eyes.

Eren jerked forward with a start as Bertolt reacted violently and roared in a voice that neither of them had ever thought he was capable of possessing. Who knew that the quietest and most timid soldier in the Survey Corps could also snap like that?

"You sons of bitches! I _swear_ I will _exterminate_ you all!" A foreign look of outrage etched on his face, the Colossal Titan shifter made to lash out at Armin, his swords in hand.

Before Eren could even attempt to call out, the noise of shredding cloth and Bertolt's staggered gasp resonated in his ears and for a few moments, the sounds of chaos and bloodshed happening all around him were muted. Did Armin get hurt? The ensuing seconds were a blur.

He was suddenly falling, and although he was glad to finally be detached from Bertolt's back, rejoicing was a thought far in the back of his mind as gravity continued to pull him down at a disconcerting speed. Physically prevented from voicing his agitation, Eren settled for desperately endeavoring to break out of the ropes binding his hands to his back.

He felt her before he heard her. Like a relentless and powerful typhoon crashing without a warning, she collided into him from behind, wrapping her arms around his torso in a vice-like grasp. A strangled sigh of relief escaped from her mouth, and he was overwhelmed by an onslaught of mixed emotions surging through him. Her chin was resting on his right shoulder as she propelled them towards the empty saddle on her stampeding horse. Too engrossed in sorting out his feelings, Eren hardly considered the fact that Armin had goaded Bertolt to buy enough time for the commander to attack and cut him loose. Hell, he hadn't even realized that the commander had saved him.

The most prominent emotion that was dominating his being was anger. What the _fuck _was she doing? Why wasn't she taking care of herself? She had just gotten the life squeezed out of her by a Titan—how many bones were broken?

He continued to seethe in silent rage, glaring furiously at the side of Mikasa's head as she deftly arranged their positions so that they dropped onto the saddle with her taking the reins.

"All units, pull back!" Erwin's booming declaration rudely drew Eren out of his vehement thoughts, and the boy belatedly realized that everyone around them was retreating at utmost haste. Whipping his head around, he could see Reiner stretch his hand out towards them and Bertolt's limp dangling figure. In almost mirthless satisfaction, he briefly wondered whether the guy was severely wounded or even better, dead. Grudgingly aware that the only thing he could do at the moment was stay put instead of thrash around and demand to be released already, he felt the anger ebb away as it was replaced by immense guilt.

Once again, they were risking their lives for him—how many people had died just now? Once again, _Mikasa_ had to save his sorry ass because he had failed. Once again, he had failed them all. Why was he so _weak_?

His self-deprecating thoughts screeched to a halt as something large soared overhead, temporarily blocking the sunlight. What was that? He felt Mikasa grow rigid and craned his neck to see if he could catch a glimpse of the cause of all the commotion over the horse's mane.

"Reiner, that bastard…" Jean's cutting tone with an underlying anxious note came from somewhere close by. "He's tossing Titans at us!"

Before he could even squirm in discomfort, within seconds, Eren found himself toppling from the saddle as the horse beneath them collapsed. He could only guess that they had been struck by one of the Titans Reiner had chucked. Panting from the scare and getting the wind knocked out of him, he lifted his throbbing head from where it had been face down on the ground and peered blearily about him. Where was _she_?

A sharp and painful intake of breath from behind him caught his attention, and it was followed by a weak but anguished, "Eren…"

It had been too long since she had last sounded so desolate. He strived to twist his body around to face her, straining against the binds. The earth below him was shaking perilously due to the heavy footfalls of pursuing Titans and pounding hooves of bolting horses nearby. A bone-chilling feeling of apprehension suddenly overcame him as his senses tingled forebodingly.

Something was approaching them.

Fully aware that he was defenseless, he looked up in trepidation and despair to greet whatever cruel doom was awaiting them. His blood ran cold and his heart seized up as Eren took in the sight of the looming figure towering above them. Shocked into silence, Mikasa didn't make a single sound, but he could feel the waves of horror and fear emitting from her—or perhaps those were his own feelings.

As fate would have it, the Smiling Titan leered down at him, the same wide and horrendous grin that was forever burned into his memory plastered on its face.

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**Initial thoughts/questions/comments/feedback? :)**


	2. Fire

**I'm overwhelmed by all of the kind reviews, favorites, and follows! You guys really give me the motivation to keep writing, so thank you all. :) Now to address Mac's suggestion, which another reviewer agreed with: I'm glad you guys brought this up, and I completely agree. But to clarify, in "Live in the Moment," Eren only initiated that one impulsive kiss in Chapter 4 out of curiosity. All of the lip-contact that followed and up until now were initiated by Mikasa, but he often just gave in because there's no use in denying the attraction that he knows is there but doesn't quite fully understand yet. I hope this explanation suffices, and we'll definitely see more developments in their relationship before they're actually officially together!**

**Okay now as for this chapter...it was honestly kind of emotionally draining to write, but I nevertheless enjoyed it and I hope it adequately conveys all of the emotions I tried to put into it! Warning: language and lots of angst. Canon dialogue plus my own. I present to you all my take on the most evident EreMika moment to date...**

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**Her Kind of Love**

**Chapter 2: Fire**

Sometime during his tumble off the horse, the gag had loosened, but he couldn't find the strength to speak, rendered completely speechless and traumatized with fear. Perspiration trickling down his face, Eren remained frozen, unable to even remember how to breathe as he found himself confronting what he had seared into his mind at the young age of ten as the very personification of death and destruction. On the day that would haunt him for eternity, this heartless fiend had brutally stripped him of the comforting home he once had and caused the world that he had known for a decade to cease to exist, hurling him into a bottomless abyss that could only be justifiably described as hell on earth.

It was why he had a broken family that could never be fixed.

_ "Eren! Did you get into a fight _again_?"_

_ He had the decency to look slightly ashamed, but his eyes were averted and flickering with something akin to restlessness. "Those idiots started it…as if I could just let them look down on me like that…"_

_ His mother wasn't pleased, her dark eyebrows drawn together like they always were as she scolded him. "And then?" Her tone was challenging and almost scornful. "Mikasa had to save you again, right?"_

_ Silently brooding, he had no snarky response to that. She was right…she was _always _right._

_ "Eren…no matter how hateful or nasty your opponents might be, that doesn't mean it's alright to just charge at them!" She plucked out a clean handkerchief from the pile of laundry she had been sorting through and grabbed his face, ignoring his heated protests as she gingerly dabbed the tender spots. "You're a man, aren't you? Just bear it once in a while."_

His memory contained a collection of these random, day-by-day conversations that had seemed so insignificant then. But on those occasions he allowed himself to slip into the convoluted aspects of his mind, he found himself desperately clinging onto these precious interactions that he could still recall as the wretched memories of the events that followed continue to threaten to overshadow everything else. If he closed his eyes and let himself drift off to the darkest recesses of his brain, in minutes he would clearly _see_ the Smiling Titan opening its mouth as it leisurely lifted his mother's broken body, like it was savoring the sensation of holding a tasty snack before indulging in it.

It was sickening, maddening, and the very incident that constantly fueled his burning desire for cold-blooded revenge; his thirst for retribution would not be quenched until the Titans were annihilated.

This monster, this demon from the depths of hell, was the reason he had become the soldier he was today. It was the reason for his ferocious rage, devastating grief, and fervent vengeance. Compassion was a burden, so he had chosen to neglect it altogether. Love resulted in obliteration and unbearable sorrow, so he had been wary and even distrustful of it ever since.

But…

_"Show Mikasa you can protect her."_

"Eren!"

Her urgent and distressed shout yanked him out of his trance, and the reality of the dire situation they were in came crashing down on him. He choked out a gasp as she suddenly threw her body over his to protect him from their impending demise. He couldn't move, couldn't grasp any of the hectic thoughts racing through his mind. Transforming wasn't an option when he was still recovering—his limbs had not fully regenerated yet and instinct was warning him that it was too soon to shift again. Doing so would probably create a mediocre Titan that would hardly stand a chance, not to mention that his hands were still tied to his back.

The Smiling Titan lunged, its right hand slicing through the air with the intention to eradicate. _Fuck_, it was going to pulverize and devour them without a second thought.

"Mikasa…" His voice was hoarse and raspy from lack of use for a period of time. She moved her left hand to clasp his bound hands and squeezed once to signal that she had heard him, but her terrified gaze remained transfixed ahead.

An infuriated yell accompanied with the thuds of a pair of running feet interrupted what he had been about to say and a few seconds later, a figure leaped over them and slashed at the Titan's outstretched hand, drawing blood and causing it to recoil.

"Mr. Hannes!" The stunned outburst came from the girl hovering over him.

"Ha! So this day has finally come, huh?!" The Garrison soldier stood steadfast like a shield in front of them, his tone overflowing with contempt and masking his fright. "Eren, Mikasa! Watch closely as I take revenge for your mother…as I_ slaughter_ it!"

Gaping at the blond man's rigid stance, Eren fleetingly wondered if after all these years, it was still false bravado. But as Hannes sprung into action without hesitation once again, the Titan shifter was gripped by fear. This was not the same coward who had abandoned his mother and woefully carried them away.

"I really wanted to see you!" Hannes fired his grapple hook and vaulted over the giant hand that nearly made contact with his body.

"Mr. Hannes!" Eren echoed Mikasa's previous interjection, watching the battle transpiring with apprehension.

Mikasa shifted from her defensive posture, her right leg crossing over his slumped body and hand reaching for the hilt of a sheathed blade. Her bared teeth were clenched as her keen eyes followed the Garrison soldier's rash movements with growing unease. There was a sheen layer of sweat on her brow, and she was visibly trembling. He wasn't sure if it was in worry, terror, or a mixture of both—and abruptly remembered that she had to be in excruciating pain. How was she still fucking _moving_?

"Mikasa, you can't!" He blurted, the emotionally-charged words spilling from his lips. "Not with those injuries!"

Looking at him, she gnawed on her bottom lip, her sullen eyes swimming with conflicted emotions. "But—"

"_No_!" Eren found himself snarling in raw fury as he glared up at her unhealthily pale face. "I won't let you! In your condition, you'll be killed, and I _can't_—I just…" He shook his head and inhaled deeply. "Release my hands!"

"Your hands?" She repeated as her eyes darted down to the ropes.

"Hurry!" He knew he was snapping at her, but there wasn't any time to lose; he'd consider apologizing once they were out of this mess. In all honesty, he had no fucking idea what he was going to do, but he needed to have his hands functional first. He could hear her laborious breathing as she pulled out her blade. She wasn't going to twitch another muscle and further damage her body after cutting through his binds, not if he could help it.

"I have to do it! I have to be the one to finish it!"

As soon as his hands were freed, he flexed his fingers a few times to regain circulation and scrambled up onto his knees, just in time to see Hannes get seized by the Smiling Titan's left hand. It was happening _again_. All over again.

Beside him, Mikasa made a gruff noise of indignation and lurched forward, the same murderous glimmer in her blazing gaze. In his numb stupor, he didn't react quickly enough to stop her, only starting when she cried out as she dropped to the ground in a heap of limbs. Both of her hands were fisting her shirt over her chest, her breaths coming out in erratic pants and sweat dripping down her face. Flinging himself over so that he was facing her, he reached out with one shaky hand and tipped her chin up so that her eyes met his. She was as white as a sheet, and Eren began to feel the panic rising within him.

He knew that saving Hannes was a lost cause. The man had engaged the enemy knowing that there was a possibility he wouldn't be leaving these grounds alive. That kind of foolish bravery made him want laugh, both at his family friend and himself—because deep down, he knew that if circumstances had permitted it, he could very well be in Hannes's spot. Blinded by rage and succumbing to his impulsive nature, he probably would have irrationally charged at the Smiling Titan head-on if he had been equipped with his 3DMG.

But now, he realized that this recklessness wouldn't have ended well for him. Unable to continue suppressing the emotions he had been diligently keeping under control for a while now, he bowed his head as incredulous laughter bubbled out of his open mouth. Mikasa was eerily quiet, hunched over and now as still as stone.

"Nothing has changed at all!" He spat out between bouts of crazed laughter, rapidly blinking as hot tears clouded his vision. "You…you can't do anything!_ Nothing_ at all!" He caught his breath and swallowed thickly before lapsing back into his frenzied state. "Mom, I couldn't…I _still_ can't do anything…"

The ear-piercing scream that forced its way out of his lungs startled even himself.

* * *

It hurt to breathe; a stinging spark of pain shot through her torso with every breath she took, and she was already drowning in the persisting torture that came with fractured bones. Her cracked ribcage had been jostled when she had caught Eren in her arms and fallen off her horse, landing painfully on her arms that had immediately tucked into her body to cushion the impact. And just now, her abrupt movement had caused the pain to intensify tenfold. Although this was unlike anything she had ever experienced before, she knew that this feeling of pain was just all in her head; she could build up her mental barriers and defeat it. It didn't sound like a daunting task.

But she was aware that she had completely overexerted herself, to the point where her body was actually rebelling against her wishes, unwilling to cooperate. It was already disheartening and disappointing enough to have gotten physically impaired, and while she refused to give in, it didn't seem like fate was in their favor. She had been too careless; Eren had been rescued, but the imminent future looked more somber with each passing second.

_Mr. Hannes_…the grisly sight of his intestines stimulated her stomach nauseously; she could almost taste the bile. Yet another person who mattered had been lost. They had escaped from the frying pan only to be tossed right into the roaring fire. Had it all been in vain?

Mikasa took in their surroundings with a sweep of her eyes, noting grimly that the Smiling Titan was still distracted at the moment by its latest victim. Their comrades were valiantly fighting in the distance, but it didn't seem like reinforcements would be coming for them anytime soon. Her eyes locked onto a head of flaxen hair, and she heaved a sigh in relief. Armin was alive, but from the looks of it, he was in a pinch as well. In a matter of minutes, other Titans in the vicinity would be encroaching, and they would undoubtedly have no escape route.

Maybe…maybe it hadn't all been in vain. Eren was within her reach again.

"Eren…" Her gentle voice penetrated the gloomy atmosphere enveloping them. Speaking contributed to the mounting pain, but she had to tell him. His head shot up, and he stared at her with such emptiness on his tear-stained face that she ached to hold him in her arms. And so she did. Despite the wince she couldn't conceal, she caught his brows furrow in concern before leaning in and tenderly entwining her arms around his taut neck, mindful of leaving space between their chests. He relaxed under her touch ever-so slightly, taking a whiff of the scent of her hair.

"That isn't true." She murmured into his ear soothingly, stroking his dark locks affectionately. He sniffled and didn't return her embrace, but she knew that he was listening. "There's something I want to tell you." Mikasa's fingers never stopped their soft ministrations. "Thank you…for being together with me."

He grunted and made to pull back, but she tightened her arms around him almost desperately. Moisture prickled the corners of her eyes, and she didn't bother to keep it at bay. "Thank you…for teaching me how to live."

Eren successfully leaned away this time, and she let him. He appeared to be bewildered and appalled, his mouth agape and wide eyes filled with unshed tears. She shyly diverted her eyes downwards as her hand curled itself around the fabric she almost always wore around her neck. "Thank you…for wrapping this scarf around me." The smile she graced him with when she looked up again was watery but nonetheless dazzling.

* * *

What was she saying? Why did she make it sound like they were parting? Where the fuck was she going…_without him_?

He slowly shook his head in bewilderment and disbelief. She couldn't possibly be serious right now; yes, the series of catastrophic events that had just occurred must have affected her enough to have temporarily addled her brain. Mikasa couldn't possibly believe that this was the end of the road. For a few moments, he had been drained of hope himself, but there was no fucking way he was about to give in. He was going to fight because only then would they have a chance of winning. He was going to fight because he wasn't even close to accomplishing his goal yet—this was merely a hurdle that he needed to overcome. He was going to fight because she couldn't; it was finally his turn to show her that he could protect her as well.

Watching the beads of liquid leak from her shining eyes as her face lit up with the most breathtaking smile he had ever seen made his head spin. Crying and yet smiling. This girl before him was the embodiment of dichotomies; graceful but deadly, a tough exterior but fragile heart, an icy demeanor but warm smile. She was occasionally a thorn in his side but at other times a wild rose with an addictive aroma that ensnared his senses and left him pining for her when they were apart. But above all, she was family and yet more important than that. She was…

Mikasa cupped his cheek with her other hand, her tears cascading down the soft planes of her face. It was the most heart-wrenching but beautiful spectacle he had ever beheld. As she inched closer, he wondered with bated breath whether she was really going to do this, here and now. It had been a while since she had initiated this aspect of their relationship that he didn't dislike but still didn't quite understand—but this was hardly an opportune moment. Her lips were tickling his then in the lightest of brushes as she whispered those three words that he had yet to reciprocate.

And now was not the right time for him to do so either. There would be a more appropriate opportunity in the future, once he had figured out what laid hidden and dormant deep inside his own heart. Loving someone was a risk that he wasn't certain he had the capacity to take on. But first, they needed to both stay _alive_.

Drawing away resolutely, he forced himself onto his feet and looked away before her hurt expression could make him feel guilty, his fists clenching and fierce determination showing his resolve. "I know." He gave her his automatic response before turning his back to her and glancing at her over his shoulder, his expression hard and voice adopting a rough edge. "Something like that…I'll wrap as many times as I need to."

Eren brought his right fist up, staring defiantly into the face of death. Weaponless, he wasn't entirely certain what he was doing, but his body seemed to be fully aware as it acted on its own. His hands were still in the process of returning to its human texture, but there was something burning inside of him, a pit of fire in his stomach that was rapidly spreading to the rest of him. He felt confused and yet in control, invigorated, and _empowered_.

"From now on…I'll continue to do so. As many times as I need to." He mustered up all of his strength and swung his fist out then, directly at the Titan's open hand, yelling with all of his might. Without hesitation, he swung out his other fist in succession, aiming to make contact.

Something gigantic thundered behind him, and suddenly a Titan was soaring over his head and wrestling the unsuspecting Smiling Titan to the ground. What the _fuck_? Awestruck and shell-shocked, he could only wonder whether his sanity was intact as more Titans flew through the air and assaulted his mother's killer. Shit, they were cannibalistically _ripping_ it apart. He watched in morbid fascination and borderline satisfaction as the Smiling Titan's right arm, the very hand that had crushed his mother, was tossed into the air. Over the horrific cacophony of shredding and biting, his ears picked up on a weak noise of astounded surprise from behind him.

_Mikasa_.

Whirling around, he took a second to absorb her stark astonishment, knowing that it probably reflected what was on his own face. Then with a sense of urgency, he bent down with his back to her again, motioning for her to get on. "Quick, Mikasa!"

Tearing her eyes away from the chaotic and perplexing scene before them, she understood immediately and cautiously draped her arms over his shoulders, interlocking them together around his neck and bringing her legs up as he hooked his arms behind her knees. He allowed her a moment to adjust her position before taking off, running as fast as his two legs could towards the rest of the Survey Corps with her added weight. Eren wished that he could be gentler with her as she was enduring the pain from shattered bones, but there unfortunately wasn't such an option, not when this was their only chance to flee.

"Why…" She struggled to speak between her uneven breaths. "Is it…getting eaten…?"

He didn't have an answer for her; he was asking himself the same damn question. What the fuck was going on? "Save your breath, Mikasa. I don't want you to hurt yourself any further." It was a brusque order, but it was said with her well-being in mind.

From out of his peripheral vision, he saw the Armored Titan barreling towards them, not a single Titan clinging onto it or obstructing its path. It seemed like Bertolt was still alive as well. Fuck, how had they managed to escape from the crowd Reiner had been having trouble fending off not too long ago?

Gritting his teeth as a surge of anger coursed through his veins, Eren felt something snap within him, and the same unfathomable aura from before claimed him. "Don't come here! Shit, I'll fucking kill you!" He had barely registered the Armored Titan's faltering steps when a voice he had never been happier to hear rang out.

"Eren!" Like an angel sent from heaven with his crown of golden hair, Armin was rushing towards him on horseback with an unconscious Jean behind him and leading Mikasa's horse. It was a huge relief to see that his best friend was unharmed—intensely shaken, given by the naked terror openly displayed in his large cerulean eyes, but alive. Pitching forward to grab the reins from him, Eren hoisted Mikasa up onto the empty saddle first before jumping on himself and urging the horse into action.

"Don't let this chance get away!" Erwin's voice traveled from several meters ahead. "Pull back!"

As the horse below him galloped in sync with the others in a troop, Eren twisted his head to the side just in time to see a smaller class Titan latch onto the Armored Titan's right leg. It was followed by a swarm of other Titans, all eager to pounce with their grotesque mouths wide open. They were the same Titans that had been devouring the Smiling Titan only moments ago. Bertolt's fearful shout rose above the din, and Eren faintly heard Connie's exasperated call of, "Hey, you ugly hag! What are you doing?! Let's hurry back!"

_Ymir_…He hadn't forgotten what had transpired back in the forest before he was knocked unconscious. From his position up ahead, he watched the Dancing Titan waver for a few seconds before stretching down to caress a head of blonde hair—Krista…or was it _Historia_? And then, quick as lightning, Ymir was sprinting away from their formation and leaping into the mass of Titans surrounding Reiner and Bertolt.

So she was one of _them_ now, huh?

Sizzling with anger, he turned away then and took a few deep breaths to calm himself; there was no use getting worked up when they were retreating. Furrowing his brows, he opted to try to reason through this…but what exactly was he supposed to _think_ about all this? And what was that strange phenomenon he had apparently, inexplicably caused twice? Where did that power even come from? There couldn't be a logical explanation for it!

Nothing made sense anymore—not that anything had made much sense to begin with. In this fucked up world, it seemed like anything was possible. But at least they were among their comrades now; it was as safe as they could be until they reached the interior of the walls.

Releasing a breath that he hadn't been aware of even holding, the dark-haired boy felt Mikasa tighten her grip around his waist as if her life depended on it. He wasn't oblivious to just how flaring the pain was—after all, he had gotten a leg and arm chomped off before. But he knew that it wasn't just tangible pain she was suffering. His cheeks were still wet, and he felt a fresh wave of tears brimming in his eyes.

_Mr. Hannes_…

Gathering the reins into one hand, he stared straight ahead as his other hand settled over her linked fingers and rubbed soothing circles with his thumb. A moment later, he felt her rest her cheek on his shoulder, and she murmured something that he didn't quite catch.

"Don't worry, Mikasa. We're going to be okay." He wasn't sure who he was trying to convince more.

* * *

"Just like that, set her down gently."

She took a few short and shallow breaths, lying still on the stretcher because even the smallest movement had her body erupting in a fit of pain. Both mentally and physically worn-down, she acknowledged with a grimace that the fatigue she had been fighting against for a while was now catching up to her. Straining to keep her eyes open, Mikasa met Armin's anxious gaze before focusing on the boy next to him.

"Rib fractures, compounded by long periods of being shaken on a horse…you'd better see a doctor quickly." The Survey Corps soldier on her other side giving her the initial check-up said sternly.

Guilt flitted across Eren's drawn face, and she frowned at the haggard slump of his shoulders. "Eren…" She managed in a quiet voice, lifting a hand to halt him when a look of consternation overtook his features. "I'm fine."

"_No_, you're not fine." His expression softened, and he grasped her hand in both of his, lowering his eyes. "I'm sorry…" She opened her mouth to respond but was interrupted by loud and antsy exclamations in the background.

"Commander?! Can you hear me, Commander?!"

"Shit, he's losing consciousness!"

"Hurry up and take him away!"

"Commander!" Eren was visibly startled by the sight of the commander's missing arm, and she gathered what remained of her strength to squeeze one of the hands he had encasing hers comfortingly. His worried eyes darted back to her face. She tried to smile reassuringly, but had to resort to quirking one side of her mouth up.

"It's best to move her now." The soldier spoke up, glancing at Eren before gesturing to someone else nearby to help. "She requires immediate attention."

Keeping her hand in his firm grasp, Eren looked up frantically. "Can I stay by her side?"

"No. In your current state, you would only be a hindrance." It was a curt response, his mouth set in a thin line. Taking in Eren's crestfallen expression, the soldier clapped a sturdy hand onto his shoulder, his next words noticeably kinder. "For sanitary reasons, it's strictly prohibited for _anyone_ to be allowed in the medical wards as examinations are being carried out...even the patient's significant other. I'm sorry."

Mikasa felt her heart involuntarily flutter at the thought of Eren as her "significant other." Well…he was, wasn't he? He had always been that person to her. But…had _he_ realized it yet? Her eyelids were growing heavy even as she struggled to stay awake, curious about what he was going to say and do next. But it seemed like rest was long overdue, and she found that she could no longer prolong the onset of sleep in her exhaustion.

She distantly heard Eren's fruitless attempt to protest against the rules before slipping into darkness, the traces of a smile lingering even as her grip on his hand slackened.

* * *

**R.I.P. Mr. Hannes. :( Hopefully I did this iconic scene justice; I'm a bit nervous about it, so I'd love to get some feedback! Constructive criticism and other suggestions are always appreciated! :) Also, any opinions on whether I should change the rating to M? I feel like it's a bit too violent to be just T...not to mention the explicit language. **

**As the Clash of the Titans Arc draws to a close, the Uprising Arc is in the horizon! Next chapter, we're bringing back some characters to form Levi's new squad...the Lance Corporal's nightmare of having to look after both Eren and Mikasa is coming true. It should be slightly more lighthearted from here on out. :P**


	3. Hell

**You guys seriously make me so happy with such positive responses; I really do appreciate every single review, favorite, and follow! :) And I'm now convinced to keep the rating as T, so thanks for helping me out! So these chapters seem to just get longer and longer...Chapter 2 was 1k words longer than Chapter 1, so naturally this chapter is 1k words longer than Chapter 2. Let's see how long this trend lasts. Just a quick note: aside from some substance that turns humans into Titans, medical research probably isn't very advanced in the SnK universe, but let's just pretend that they have painkillers (pills and injections), okay? Okay.**

* * *

**Her Kind of Love**

**Chapter 3: Hell**

The first thing she noticed when she came to was the dull ache in her chest—the pain she remembered feeling before passing out had been significantly worse. It was probably thanks to the painkillers she had most likely been drugged with. The next thing she observed was that the scratchy texture of the stretcher was no longer underneath her body. Her hands were fisted around a wool blanket that she was covered with, and there was a pillow cushioning her head. Cracking her eyes open, Mikasa found herself gazing at an unfamiliar ceiling made of wood. There was a window to her left, and judging from the faint glow of yellow streaming through, the sun was just about to rise. It had been mid-afternoon the last time she checked. How long had she been asleep for?

_Eren_…where was he? A hand reached up to touch the scarf around her neck. Had he gotten rest and slept off the exhaustion from his transformation?

She frowned and turned her head to the right, only to be surprised by the sight of her former roommate nodding off in a chair next to the bed. Mikasa noted with wry amusement that there was drool trickling out from one side of the girl's mouth. Typical Sasha.

It had been quite a while since she'd last seen or heard from the brunette. Weeks, in fact. The last time the two of them had actually had a chance to talk was the day after the 57th expedition. Then Sasha, along with the other Survey Corps soldiers in their class, had been sent to be stationed in the southern districts of Wall Rose, and she, Eren, and Armin had their hands full with the complex feat of capturing the Female Titan. What had she done since then? Just as the ebony-haired girl carefully made to sit up, the food hoarder pitched forward in her sleep and snapped awake with a start, blinking owlishly. When their eyes met, Sasha grinned broadly, swiping the back of her hand across her mouth before wiping that same hand on her long skirt. The other girl felt her left eye twitch involuntarily.

"Mikasa! You're up!" Clapping her hands together exuberantly like she hadn't just been napping a second ago, she leaned forward in her seat, her expression eager. "How are you feeling?"

The girl in question gingerly propped up her pillow, and the brunette quickly got up to help her sit with her back against it. Mikasa briefly smiled her thanks. "I'm fine…numb enough to not feel most of the pain."

"Yeah, but only because of the painkillers the doctor injected you with." Sasha sat down again and gestured to the small bottle of pills on the table next to the bed. "I heard that you're supposed to take them whenever it gets unbearable, but no more than four times per day."

"Who did you hear that from? The doctor?" Mikasa questioned mildly.

"Um…" The other girl suddenly looked sheepish. "Indirectly. I was eavesdropping on the conversation he was having with Eren and the Lance Corporal."

"Eren?" Perking up at the sound of his name, she sat up straight. "Where is he? Is he okay?"

"Whoa, calm down." Sasha put up her hands, a knowing smile creeping across her face. "He's sleeping in the room across from ours, along with all the other guys. Krista is supposed to share this room with us." She motioned to the two empty beds behind her. "But she insisted on letting you have the room to yourself for the time being, so she made a makeshift bed in the boys' room, which is naturally much larger in size considering that there are more of them than us. Rather inappropriate of her, wouldn't you agree?" Her smile turned cheeky for a few moments before she grew serious. "They all looked so exhausted—especially Eren. While everyone was being examined and treated for injuries, the Lance Corporal and I regrouped with you guys. You were asleep throughout this whole ordeal, but that's when I heard him and Eren ask the doctor who treated you about your condition and the recovery process. The Lance Corporal then asked if it would be safe for you to be transported by wagon…the doctor was very hesitant at first, but the Lance Corporal made it a point to emphasize that they didn't have time to stick around, so he conceded as long as there were others with you in the wagon to make the ride as smooth as possible. Eren seemed to be very upset by the thought of you being moved only a couple of hours after treatment, but he didn't dare to oppose the Lance Corporal's orders." She paused for dramatic effect. "And as it turned out, we were all going with you."

Taking a second to process Sasha's update, Mikasa glanced around the small but nonetheless cozy room. "Who else is here? And where are we?"

"Aside from Eren, Krista, and me, there's Armin, Connie, and Jean." Sasha ticked the names off her fingers. "So there's seven of us…and the Lance Corporal. We're in a cabin somewhere away from civilization—it was too dark out last night for me to tell where we were going." Something suddenly occurred to her, and she pointed behind her. "Ah, the Lance Corporal and I got everyone's stuff before meeting up with you guys. Your belongings are in that closet."

"Why did the shorty station us here?"

Sasha snorted at that. "Mikasa, don't let him hear you call him that. He never told me or the rest of us why we're here, but maybe he's waiting until we're all well-rested and gathered to let us know what's going on—everyone literally passed out as soon as we got here late in the evening. If I were to venture a guess, I'd say that the only logical reason for us to be so isolated is because we're in hiding." She pursed her lips in thought and released a huff, dropping her elbow onto the table and resting her cheek on her palm. "I just haven't figured out _why_ that would be. What did I miss out on?"

Mulling over the girl's insightful reasoning, Mikasa was quiet for a few seconds, unsure how or where to even begin. Perhaps the fact that there were immobile but very much _alive_ Titans _in_ Wall Sina, and Krista came from a family that supposedly possesses secrets linked to it? Or the revelation that three of their classmates were Titan shifters as well? And then there was the horde of Titans Eren had somehow unleashed on the Smiling Titan…no, she needed to talk to him about that first.

"A lot." She finally settled for a vague answer, staring the curious girl dead in the eye. "Long story short, we're most likely protecting Eren and Kris—Historia. I'm sure all of the details will be revealed later."

"Who's Historia?" The brunette crinkled her nose in confusion.

"It's Krista's real name."

"…Huh?"

"I'm not entirely sure myself either, but she will probably tell us herself."

Bemused, Sasha scrunched up her face and appeared to have a million of questions on the tip of her tongue but decided in the end to accept her words for the time being, and they lapsed into a compatible silence that Mikasa punctured with a soft, "How have you been?" Another thought suddenly occurred to her. "And why weren't you sleeping in a bed?"

"Well, Eren was being stubborn about getting rest—he insisted that he was feeling just fine and wanted to stay by your bedside even after carrying you up here." The brunette didn't bother to stifle her smirk as a distinct tinge of pink blossomed on the other girl's cheeks. "But he looked really awful, like he had just gone through hell and back. So I offered to look after you in his stead and forced him to go to bed." She averted her gaze, but not quickly enough. Mikasa was a bit taken aback by the hollow emptiness in her somber amber eyes. "I…I had my own share of experiencing hell. In a village close to my own." She swallowed thickly and took a deep breath. "But at least I've had a few days to recover from it, so I didn't mind staying up."

"Thank you, Sasha." Mikasa said sincerely, touched by such kindness that she wasn't used to receiving. The girl before her nodded solemnly, still haunted by the horrors that were plaguing her mind, and the darker-haired girl hesitated before murmuring, "Do you want to talk about it?"

Sasha's eyes flew up in surprise, and Mikasa found that she was rather astonished herself. But somehow, over the past few years, Sasha had become a good friend; the only girl in the Survey Corps she was comfortable around—enough to have occasional conversations with and reveal hints of her inner insecurities. Ymir was out of the picture, and Historia…well, Mikasa had been on relatively friendly terms with her, but now she wasn't sure how it would be anymore. That girl simply wasn't who everyone had thought she was, and those recent discoveries certainly changed things. She idly wondered whether the blonde girl harbored any ill feelings towards her for giving her such a ruthless ultimatum.

_Eren and Ymir. Which will it be?_

But, she'd still been considerate and thoughtful enough to give Mikasa the room for the night, hadn't she?

Sasha cleared her throat then, and Mikasa focused her attention back to the topic at hand. "Um…well, when we heard the news that Wall Rose had supposedly been breached, I went with the squad that was to evacuate the residents in neighboring villages to the north, where my own village was. But before I could even make it back there, I came across Titan footprints and a village that seemed deserted." She licked her lips nervously but pressed on. "But there…there was still a child and her mother…who was getting eaten when I arrived at the scene. I tried to kill the Titan with a hatchet that I picked up outside the house, but I couldn't make any cuts that were deep enough so I—without my swords or 3DMG, there wasn't anything I could do, so I just grabbed the girl and ran out." Her round eyes reflected the fear and guilt she still felt. "My horse bolted off, the Titan pursued us, but I guess luck was on our side because someone had left a bow and a few arrows. Before I turned to face the Titan, I told the little girl to run…because even if she was afraid and weak, there would be others out there who would help her. And for a second, I thought that I was going to die—I _knew_ that I would die if I didn't succeed, and the Titan would probably also reach the girl. But _somehow_, somehow I managed to blind it with all of the arrows I had and escaped…that encounter…it was too _close_—"

Abruptly breaking off, she looked like she was on the verge of tears, and after a moment of consideration, Mikasa opened her arms as a silent invitation. Sasha didn't waste any time in throwing herself onto the bed, being mindful of Mikasa's fragile state and ending up with her head on Mikasa's lap. The brunette sniffled noisily and then spoke up again, her voice quaking. "I was so afraid—I remember that my arms were shaking and my aim was off the first couple of tries. And I was trapped in its grip for a few moments, but I…I somehow survived." A short, incredulous laugh bubbled out of her mouth. "And so did the child. We were both saved by my father and the other villagers he was leading."

"Your father?" Mikasa reiterated quietly, soothingly stroking the girl's brown locks tied back in its usual ponytail. Sasha had never mentioned her family before.

"Yeah…it was my first time seeing him in three years. I was so relieved to see that he was unharmed and still _alive_." She looked up at the other girl, her eyes welling with fresh tears. "He said that I'd grown up and become a splendid person. But if that's true, then why wasn't I happy to hear it?" The brunette began to cry in earnest then, her tears freely falling as she muffled her blubbering into the blankets.

"Sasha…" Mikasa started, a bit warily, her fingers pausing. "You were very brave. You did the right thing."

"But the mother…I just took her child and left, and I didn't even go back after to see if…_if_—"

"No, you did what you could." Mikasa stated firmly, her tone unwavering and fingers resuming their comforting treatment. "With her wounds, she wouldn't have been able to make it either way."

Her mind suddenly conjured vivid images of her own mother and Eren's, but she quickly repressed them before they could meddle with her thoughts. "You did the right thing." She repeated, her heart heavier than it had been just moments ago. The brunette sniveled loudly, her body still convulsing with sobs.

Two crisp knocks on the door had both of them freezing, and Sasha lifted her head to exchange alert looks with Mikasa. Hastily wiping her eyes and motioning for the injured girl to stay put, Sasha stood up and began to make her way towards the door. But before she had even walked halfway across the room, the door was opened from the other side and the ever impatient Lance Corporal swept in. The black-haired girl resisted rolling her eyes—what had been the point of knocking then? Some things just didn't change.

"I'm a light sleeper, and the walls are thin." Was his curt greeting in his signature bored drawl. His appearance was impeccable for someone who had supposedly just woken up; not a hair was out of place and not a wrinkle on his white collared shirt was in sight. Mikasa suspected that he had actually been awake for longer than he was insinuating. His sleeves were neatly rolled up to the elbows, and he was devoid of his military jacket and cape. If Sasha's hypothesis that they were in hiding was indeed true, then it would make sense for all of them to ditch any attire sporting the Survey Corps logo.

Sasha's arms flailed around wildly for a few seconds before she regained her composure and brought her right fist over her heart in a hasty salute. "I apologize, sir!" She squeaked out.

Levi glanced at her and did a double-take when he noticed her tear-stained face, a trace of a scowl tugging at his lips. "Does my appearance repulse you that much?"

"H-Huh?" The girl in question balked, caught completely off guard by his unexpected question. "No, sir, of course not."

"Then why are you crying?" He demanded irritably, his eyes narrowing into slits. "I don't want to see such an ugly face first thing in the morning."

Unsurprisingly, this insensitive man was terrible at dealing with upset individuals…especially girls. Mikasa glowered at him, intending to retort defensively on Sasha's behalf, but promptly bit her tongue when she glimpsed the faint pull of the other girl's lips. _Huh_.

"Yes, sir!" Sasha's tone was colored with embarrassment but it was considerably less shaky than before.

Slanting his eyes over to the stiff figure on the bed, Levi frowned in obvious disapproval. "How do you greet a superior?"

Her grudge against this man had gradually ebbed away over the past few weeks, and she had even come to feel indebted to him in a way because after all, he had saved Eren from the Female Titan. She also couldn't help but feel a pang of guilt that was accompanied with a sour taste in her mouth whenever she saw him after that incident, since he had sprained his ankle as a consequence of her rashness. Seeing humanity's strongest soldier on the sidelines just wasn't right, and it had been her fault.

Clenching her jaw, Mikasa evenly met his glare and brought her right fist up, placing it gingerly over her chest. Training his cool gaze on her, he assessed her for a few moments and then fluidly dropped into the vacant chair, crossing his legs and folding his arms over his chest. He remarked blandly, "You made a blunder again."

That _midget_. Dammit, he didn't need to rub salt into the wound.

Mikasa gritted her teeth but responded in a deceptively calm voice. "I took the opportunity that was presented, but I…miscalculated, sir."

"How many times do you have to 'miscalculate' before you learn your lesson?" The Lance Corporal deadpanned, but his next words were said with underlying ire. "Do you think you'll be that fucking lucky next time?"

She was silently brooding, her lips thinly pressed together. Sasha was still awkwardly lingering in the background; she looked torn between wanting to lean in closer in interest and high-tailing it out of the room. But both options attracted attention, so she opted to just stay where she was and continue nibbling on her bottom lip, her flighty eyes darting back and forth between the two seated individuals.

"I'm aware that you and Eren have some sort of…" He trailed off, his lip curling in distaste. "_Intimate relationship_, but you are not in any position to jeopardize your life like that."

Normally she would have blushed, but the implications of the second half of his statement made her forget all about being flustered. She couldn't keep the bite out of her voice. "We are soldiers; we put our lives on the line every single time we are out there. Eren is essential to the future of mankind, so I believe I was fulfilling my duties as a soldier by reclaiming him from the enemies."

"Yes, almost at the cost of your life. Fantastically done." His voice was oozing with sarcasm, and it took everything within her to not lash out at him—if not physically, then at least a sharp jab at his short stature.

Her eyes flashed with diligently subdued anger. "My life is my own to keep or risk for a cause."

There was a flicker of annoyance in his otherwise impassive expression. "Do you even know what they say about you?" He took her tense silence as a no. "They say that you're a prodigy and worth more than hundreds of soldiers. You graduated at the top of your class, and you've impressed every superior you've come in contact with. Do you know what this means?"

She shook her head, uncertain where he was going with this. He tsked and clicked his tongue. "It means that you're irreplaceable, dumbass. To put it bluntly, your level of skill makes you much more valuable than most soldiers in the whole fucking military, and thus your life is not to be taken lightly." Levi sighed and brought a hand up to pinch the bridge of his nose, as if he was feeling the onset of a major migraine. When his eyes flicked back to hers, there was a frosty glint in them. "So I need your word, Mikasa. The Survey Corps needs your abilities to protect Eren…something that you're more than willing to do whether asked to or not. You have the duty to accomplish the task at hand, but you are to do so precisely after considering any possible consequences and without being blinded by any _feelings_." The contempt was evident in his tone, and he looked like he was suppressing a sneer. "Like I said before, you need to grasp this concept of self-control."

A bit surprised by what he had revealed, Mikasa grudgingly nodded, her dark eyes stony. "I understand, sir. I won't act irrationally again, but I will always do whatever it takes to ensure Eren's safety."

Levi stared hard at her. "As long as you learn to think it through, strike at the right time, and don't get yourself killed in the process. Trust your instincts, but not when they are dulled by emotions. If you want to stay by Eren's side, you must learn to prevent them from screwing with your judgment. I don't want a repeat of this, you hear?"

"Yes, sir."

"If you weren't on a whole different level, I would personally make sure that you're as far away from Eren as possible. Do you understand what I'm saying?"

Mikasa felt her heart seize up momentarily; just the thought of being separated from Eren for an undisclosed period of time nearly had her hyperventilating. Steeling her nerves, she silently vowed to change her mindset. In order to protect Eren, she couldn't allow her actions to be solely driven by her feelings, for they were both a vice and virtue. The burning desire to keep him safe awakened her feral side and gave her the strength to fight, but at the same time, it blinded her, _consumed_ her. Her task was to find a balance between the two and be more rational…like Armin. Perhaps he had some pointers for her; it was his forte after all.

It was rather ironic how her feelings could have been the reason for her to be sent away from Eren. But she was stronger than the majority, and it would remain that way as long as humanity needed her; she had worked hard to get here, all for Eren, and nothing would tear her away from him now.

"I understand, sir."

Searching her fierce expression, Levi seemed to find what he was looking for as he nodded once and stood up. He made to turn away but paused and glanced back at her. "Don't get caught up in the praise. You still have years to go before you can even get close to my level." With a borderline haughty sniff, he stalked away, only to stop in front of a slightly cowering Sasha. "You, what did I say about your face? Go wash it."

Her answer was an unanticipated and loud hiccup. Slapping both hands over her mouth in embarrassment, she scuttled out of the room, nearly tripping over her own feet.

Shaking his head, he muttered something along the lines of "stupid brats" and "can't fucking believe this." Directing one last glare at Mikasa, he ordered dryly, "Get some more rest. We'll gather for a meeting later today—I'm sure you're all dying to know why you're here."

Without waiting for a response, he closed the door behind him, leaving her to sort out her jumbled thoughts. Did the shorty just compliment her…in his own twisted way? And was that his strange method of showing that he _cared _about her health? If she was indeed as valued as he had said…then she had a title to live up to. To remain by Eren's side and for his sake, she would have to quickly recuperate and train even more rigorously than before. Making a mental note to discuss this with Armin, Mikasa gently eased herself back underneath the covers, still pondering.

There were more people depending on her than she had been aware of. That alone was a frightening thought.

The door creaked open, and Sasha crept into the room. She dove onto the next bed over and crawled under the blankets, beaming widely at the other girl. "You're amazing, Mikasa. Even humanity's strongest recognizes your abilities."

Mikasa pulled a face, and Sasha chuckled quietly, remembering the Lance Corporal's comment about the thin walls. Sobering, the brunette faltered, dropping her smile and assuming a serious persona. "But he was also too harsh…it's not like you're trying to get yourself killed. You're just willing to risk it all for Eren."

The dark-haired soldier didn't say anything, and Sasha interpreted her silence as a sign that she didn't want to talk about it. "Just make sure to take care of yourself, Mikasa." The top graduate of their class nodded, and the huntress brightened, a mischievous glimmer in her eyes. "Hey, so did you notice how the Lance Corporal seemed like he couldn't even stand saying the words 'relationship' and 'feelings'? What a grump…you reckon he's ever loved someone?"

Mikasa lifted an incredulous eyebrow. "Think about what you just asked, Sasha."

The brunette scratched her cheek, humming in thought. "Yeah, probably not. He's practically married to his job."

The other girl reflexively made an amused sound at that, eliciting a goofy grin from Sasha.

"It's almost a pity though—he'd probably be less uptight if there was a special someone in his life. That would be better for all of us." Sasha nodded to herself. "Well anyways, I guess we should get some more sleep then, while we can. It's not every day we get such nice treatment!" The brunette burrowed her face into her pillow and within minutes, her breathing was steady. She must have been tired—after all, she had sat on an uncomfortable wooden chair for most of the night.

Softly smiling, Mikasa closed her eyes and felt sleep slowly reclaim her.

* * *

"Wake up, you brats!"

Eren shot up in his bed with a start, digging the heels of his palms into his eyes to clear his blurry vision. To his left, Armin was scratching his head groggily, and to his right, Jean was sitting up and stifling a yawn. Connie had tumbled off his bed at the rude awakening and was now wincing and rubbing his shaved head. And Historia was clambering out of her pile of blankets on the floor, staring wide-eyed at the unimpressed Lance Corporal standing under the doorway.

"I've let you all sleep for long enough. It's a quarter to eleven."

The Titan shifter quickly performed a mental calculation. His squad leader was right; they had slept for roughly eleven hours, which was twice the usual amount they were able to get. No wonder he felt well-rested for the first time since that deep sleep he had fallen into after Annie's capture. That time, it had taken him eleven hours of solid rest, five more hours of light dozing, and an additional five hours until the after-effects of transforming had all passed. But this time, just after eleven hours of uninterrupted rest, he felt as good as new. Perhaps it was because he had already had some time to recover while he was unconscious. Or maybe it was because compared to his previous transformation, which he clearly recalled having trouble with, this one had transitioned rather smoothly and without any complications. Was he finally doing something right? Well either way, he was extremely glad to not have woken up feeling like shit.

All five occupants of the room appeared to simultaneously realize the presence of a superior officer and scrambled to stand up, saluting out of sync. Levi took in this messy spectacle with his hands on his hips and slowly shook his head disdainfully. "I'll overlook this sad display this one time because you all had a rough day yesterday. But from now on, I expect nothing short of punctuality, understood?"

"Yes, sir!" They chorused.

"Now then, I took it upon myself to do some initial cleaning, but there's still much to do throughout the week." The Lance Corporal turned a deaf ear to the grumbles. "After washing up, I want Eren, Historia, and Connie preparing for lunch in the kitchen. Armin and Jean, you two will sort out the supplies we currently have and make a list of what we will need for the weeks to come."

Eren was stunned; from what he knew, the Lance Corporal didn't address just anyone by his or her given name. While he was already used to it, having already been a part of his squad for weeks now, the others… A quick glance at them confirmed his guess that they were surprised as well. So did that mean…?

"Yes, sir!"

Levi stepped aside, and the soldiers began to file out the door and march down the stairs. "You." He halted the blonde girl, who had tailed the group. She looked at him obediently, her expression carefully neutral. He frowned—where was the peppy girl who always had an irritatingly positive attitude? "You are to return to sleeping in your designated bed from now on."

"Yes, sir." She ducked her head, and he dismissed her with a wave of his hand. There was something about her indifferent demeanor that he disliked…not that he'd liked what it had been before either. But perhaps this was the true Historia Reiss, and cheery angelic Krista Lenz had just been a façade. A fake.

And now under his care. Just fucking great.

Sighing, he scanned the current state of disarray the room was in, narrowing his eyes at the unmade beds. Only one idiot had the sense to make his in a rush—Eren. Levi suddenly felt a sort of smug satisfaction; at least everyone who's been in his squad picked up the basics rather quickly. His hands were itching to make the others, but the urge to throttle someone surpassed it. Stomping out of the room and clumping down the stairs, he breezed past the fireplace and dining table to swing open the bathroom door, barging in unexpectedly.

Four pairs of startled eyes by the sinks flew over to meet his, and Levi barked irately, "You little shits will start by learning how to make your fucking beds first!" Ignoring the looks that ranged from bafflement to embarrassment, he proceeded to snap, "Where's Historia?"

As Armin was the only one who didn't have a mouth full of water, he cleared his throat to answer. "She should already be in the kitchen, sir."

Arching an eyebrow, the Lance Corporal skillfully masked his surprise. He thought back to how Sasha had volunteered to stay up and look after Mikasa. Perhaps the girls would prove to be more efficient and useful around here. Subtly nodding and turning around, he let them be and cut the dining room corner to stop at the kitchen entrance. She indeed already had a pot of water on the stove and was chopping away on the counter next to it.

"Historia."

She spun around at the sound of her name, the knife in her right hand dangerously held aloft. There was something rather disturbing about the blank look in her serene blue eyes coupled with the way she was gripping the kitchenware, as if she could butcher someone with it and do so remorselessly. Morbidly intrigued, he wondered just who she despised…perhaps him, for whatever reason? But if she truly hated him or anyone else here, there had been ample opportunities to kill the person. Then perhaps someone from her mysterious past? Or maybe herself?

What the fuck was wrong with this girl?

"Go wake up Sasha without bothering Mikasa." He honestly didn't know how to wake anyone up without causing a rude ruckus. "She is to help with lunch preparations." He paused, reconsidering his order. That girl was a glutton to the bone, and with such limited provisions… "On second thought, she's going to help with the list."

The petite blonde nodded in understanding and set down the knife, swiveling to check on the water that had yet to boil before heading out and back across the dining room. The sound of a door opening caught Levi's attention, and he watched Eren walk out of the bathroom, an evidently worried look on his face as his eyes were fixed intently on the staircase Historia had just ascended to the living quarters.

Fucking hell, what a revolting sight. Why the fuck had he damned himself to such a fate again? Maybe it wasn't too late to change his mind…after all, he had yet to inform Erwin of their current situation.

"You made your bed, and the kitchen is _this_ way." Levi said pointedly and jabbed his thumb in the direction behind him, even though he knew exactly what the boy intended to do.

Eren halted and reluctantly tore his gaze away to look at his squad leader. "I was wondering—"

"She's resting." The Lance Corporal bluntly interjected, his hawk eyes pinning the visibly uncomfortable boy.

Having nothing to say to that and embarrassed that the man had seen right through him, Eren gave the stairs once last forlorn glance before dutifully trudging towards the kitchen. As soon as the boy was out of sight, Levi brought up his hands to rub his throbbing temples and inhaled deeply, briefly closing his eyes.

And thus begins the first day of his life in hell.

* * *

**And thus begins their lives in an isolated cabin! You guys can probably tell from the prequel and now this that I'm just a tiny bit obsessed with the friendship between Mikasa and Sasha...I love them. The following chapters are going to be so much fun to write; I'm already envisioning interactions between different characters, including EreMika (duh!) along with conversations between Eren and Armin (my BroTP), Mikasa and Armin (besties forever), Mikasa and Jean (poor Jean), Eren and Jean (poor Jean), Mikasa and Historia (hmm), Sasha and Connie (cuties), Levi (the cockblocker) and basically everyone, etc.**

**Unfortunately, my life will be hectic for the next month and a half, so my updates won't be as frequent...but I'll do my best to write when I have time and have the next chapter up as soon as possible! In the meantime, I'd love to get some feedback on how I'm doing with these non-canon scenes, and let me know if you guys want to see anything in particular/have suggestions for upcoming chapters! I'm always open to ideas! :)**


	4. Hand

**Ahh I'm so sorry for this late update! This quarter of college has been stressful, but I did try to write a bit whenever I had some time to spare...usually very late at night. I missed you guys, and I hope you're all still sticking around despite my slow updates! As usual, thank you all for the motivating reviews, favorites, and follows! :) Okay, so I know that I said that things after Chapter 2 would be more lighthearted, and while I think that's true thus far, it's not SnK without the persisting angst...**

* * *

**Her Kind of Love**

**Chapter 4: Hand**

She could feel seven pairs of eyes on her. In a clockwise direction starting on her left side was Eren, who was definitely glowering. His mercury eyes were burning holes into the side of her face, and he looked like he was struggling to hold his tongue. Next to him, at one end of the rectangular table sat Levi, who was dispassionately watching her over the rim of his cup as he took a sip of water. Directly across from Eren was Jean, who appeared to be concerned by the way his brow was furrowed—he also looked like he had something to say but was tactfully withholding his words. Sitting across from Mikasa was Sasha, who was the only one grinning. Her bright amber eyes flitted from the girl before her to her untouched tray of food; she was eager to dig in but was politely restraining herself because no one else had yet to start eating. Next to Sasha was Connie, who was just outright gawking at the dark-haired soldier—probably wondering just how the heck she wasn't bedridden from those broken ribs. Historia sat at the other end of the table across from the Lance Corporal, her expression blank and large, cerulean eyes dully studying her. And finally, on Mikasa's right was Armin, who was frowning in obvious disapproval and observing her with palpable anxiety.

The silence was unsettling, and Levi seemed to agree as he was the one to break it. "So you're feeling well enough to join us." It was a statement, not a question. His gaze was on the small bottle of pills sitting on her tray.

Quickly snatching it up, Mikasa dropped the bottle onto her lap so that it was out of view. "I'm fine," she asserted in a quiet but nonetheless firm voice, and although no one spoke up to say otherwise, Eren still appeared to be just seconds away from blowing a fuse. She could understand why he was livid; if he had been the one recovering from broken bones, she would have made sure he stayed in bed for weeks. Her lips involuntarily twitching upwards, Mikasa inconspicuously reached over and covered the hand he had under the table with her own. He momentarily froze as he felt her lace their fingers together but then noticeably relaxed at the contact that wasn't unwelcome. Her eyes were purposefully averted and directed onto her food in order to not draw any attention from the others, but he could see the faint tint of pink coloring her usually pale cheeks.

"Can we eat?" Sasha huffed impatiently, her nimble fingers already inching towards her piece of bread.

"I'm surprised that you've managed to control yourself." Connie muttered next to her.

Levi arched a patronizing eyebrow and cast a swift glance at all of the faces around the table. "Well at least you brats have manners…to a certain extent." He picked up his spoon, and everyone took that as a signal to proceed eating, some infinitely more eager than others. Mikasa gave Eren's hand a covert squeeze before letting go.

They ate in stiff silence; the soldiers were suddenly extremely aware that they were sitting in such close proximity to the Lance Corporal. None of them, excluding Eren, had ever spent more than perhaps an hour in his presence at one time, let alone eat a meal with him. Shifting in his seat to Levi's left, Jean uncomfortably took a sip of water before taking a small bite of his bread, casting a swift glance at the Lance Corporal as if he was afraid he was chewing too loudly. Connie was slightly more at ease as he focused his attention on the soup, but he was taking extra care to not make any of his usual obnoxious slurping sounds. Given by his tense posture, Armin still seemed to be worried as he ate, shooting concerned looks at Mikasa every now and then. Eren, Mikasa, and Historia appeared to be unaffected by the presence of a superior and just simply ate.

"This is _so_ good!"

And then there was Sasha and her incorrigible habits.

Smacking her lips in clear satisfaction, she looked right at home as she voraciously dug into her meal, completely oblivious to Levi's narrowed eyes and the wide-eyed stares from her peers. Quite unable to withstand another second of this appalling sight, Levi set down his spoon with a clink that startled Jean, his glare intensifying tenfold. "To a certain extent." He repeated his previous statement dryly. "Didn't your parents teach you any table manners?"

Wondering who he was addressing, Sasha glanced up and realized with a start that he, along with everyone else, was looking right at her. She pondered for a few moments, her brows furrowed in concentration. "Er…don't leave even a scrap of food on your plate?"

"Idiot." Connie mumbled with a snort under his breath.

The sharp ears of a huntress naturally picked up even the smallest of sounds. She whipped her head to the side to regard him indignantly. "I dare you to repeat that."

He wasn't about to back down from a challenge now. "You're an _idiot_."

With an offended cry, Sasha exacted revenge by claiming his half-eaten bread as her own, much to Connie's consternation. Eren couldn't help but notice that Levi was visibly repulsed by their exchange—not only were they openly and obnoxiously bantering, but they were also _sharing spit_. Shit, were _those_ two brats on his other side not the only ones he had to deal with?

"Stop." His cold command ceased all movement around the table. "I will not tolerate such immature behavior during meals. The two of you can take your disgusting antics elsewhere, where I can't see them. Is that clear?" Like two peas in a pod, Sasha and Connie nodded, wearing identical guilty expressions.

Fucking hell, he couldn't look at them for a second longer. What had he gotten himself into? Fuck, the topic needed to change. Now. Willing himself to stay calm and collected, Levi took a long drink of water before promptly announcing what they had all probably been internally anticipating.

"You're all here as members of my reformed squad." There was a tight knot in his stomach, and something deep inside of him squirmed at the words "reformed squad," but he quickly repressed the memories that were still too fresh and threatening to surface. He made sure to say it in a brusque and almost indifferent manner, and he found himself instantly regretting his words. His new soldiers have thus far shown to be more trouble than they're probably worth. But then again, they were all here for a reason.

There were no collective gasps or loud exclamations of surprise; every single one of them had seen this coming, to a certain degree. But actually hearing it for themselves turned that inkling of a feeling into the truth, and they all knew what such a position meant. There were no smiles, no cheers, no airy chattering—they were gravely solemn, and all looked as if a tremendous amount of weight, perhaps more than they could manage, had just been thrown onto them to shoulder.

"Judging by the excited looks on your faces, you all know what this means." Levi quipped blandly. "I hand-picked all of you myself, for different reasons. Therefore," he paused and noted the apprehensive atmosphere in something akin to borderline satisfaction, "all of you must prove to me that you are capable of taking on such a responsibility. I have your records, but they're merely letters and numbers. Throughout the next few weeks, you will demonstrate the full range of your abilities so that I can assess them myself."

More silence. And then Eren blurted out his thoughts. "But sir, Mikasa…she hasn't—"

Levi's sharp gaze cut him off and flicked over to the girl. "Your orders for the time being are to rest. Once you have recovered, you will resume training." He paused. "At double the work to make up for lost time."

Eren fidgeted in his seat, and Mikasa could sense overwhelming discomfort radiating from him. She felt oddly buoyant at his display of concern on her behalf, but she knew what she had to do. They were all depending on her; _Eren_ was depending on her, even if he would never admit it.

"Give me one week. Two weeks max." She was very aware that fully recuperating from broken bones usually took at least a month, but there wasn't time. None of them could afford to just sit around until then.

Seven pairs of eyes were once again on her, and she resisted the urge to roll her eyes—this was starting to happen too frequently, and it was disconcerting to be under such scrutiny. She felt the intense gazes of the boys on either side of her and briefly flashed a reassuring smile at Armin before allowing her eyes to lock with Eren's. The Titan shifter was fixing her with an accusing stare, and Mikasa silently urged him to calm down. Levi regarded her stonily for a few seconds before nodding ever-so slightly, acknowledging her confident resolve. "As for the rest of you, training and assessments will begin tomorrow. Armin, Jean, and Sasha—who has the list of supplies that we have and will need?"

"I do, sir." The blond boy spoke up.

"I know that we have at least enough provisions to last us two weeks, but sometime before then the three of you will be leaving these grounds to gather more." The Lance Corporal's gaze shifted onto the boy with the shaved head. "Connie, you and I will be going into town next week for some unfinished business. Hange specifically requested your presence there."

Just as surprised and curious as everyone else except for Historia, Sasha turned to look at the boy, ready to rapid fire questions, but the words died in her throat when she caught sight of his drawn face and somber hazel eyes. She had never seen him look so haggard before.

"Yes, sir." He sounded weary and resigned. The brunette's frown deepened, and she leaned into his personal space to get a better look at him only to have him angle his face away.

"Sir." Armin's voice penetrated the lingering tension in the air. "I have a question."

Levi nodded for him to continue. Unknowingly tightening the grip he had on his spoon, Armin took a deep breath. "I understand that our mission as members of your new squad is to protect Eren and Historia while we proceed towards our goals. We're behind the walls and isolated from civilization. So then why…do we need firearms?" It was a question that had been plaguing his mind ever since he and Jean took note of the collection of shotguns and rifles among their supplies. Sure, it was usual for there to be firearms available, but the fact that there was enough for all of them to carry at least one didn't feel right. Armin had a hunch as to why, but he desperately hoped that he was wrong.

The Lance Corporal's answer struck a nerve within all of them and sent cold chills down their spines. "When we're hiding the two people who hold humanity's fate in their hands, anyone and everyone can be an enemy."

Overcome with a foreboding sense of dread, Jean spoke up for the first time since lunch began. "Are you saying that even humans…?" He trailed off, looking sick to the stomach and unable to finish his sentence.

"Nothing is certain." Levi clipped monotonously. "We must be prepared for anything." There was no hesitation whatsoever in his voice, and he left no room for discussion.

A strained and deafening silence stretched on as uneasy glances were exchanged, and Mikasa once again felt irritated. These damn silences. Yet another occurrence that was probably going to make regular appearances from now on.

"Ah!" A sudden outburst jolted everyone out of his or her own thoughts. "The food is getting cold!"

Thank Holy Wall Maria for Sasha.

* * *

While there was still some lingering tension in the air, lunch finished in a considerably more relaxed manner than it had started, and there had even been a lighthearted joke or two at Sasha's expense. Things were occasionally awkward because they were all still adjusting to their new living situation, but they would undoubtedly fall into a more comfortable routine in a few more days or so.

Eren volunteered to escort Mikasa back up the stairs so she could rest and was rather puzzled by the Lance Corporal's quiet scoff and annoyed by the nasty look from Jean. But no one said anything, so the Titan shifter carefully draped Mikasa's left arm over his shoulders and reflexively grabbed her waist when she sagged heavily against him. As they turned away, the boy thought he heard giggles from Sasha and Connie. What the hell? He was itching to demand why they were acting so suspiciously and ask just what the heck Connie would be doing in town, but willed himself to ignore them for the time being. There would be opportunities later to corner them, and besides, he was currently more agitated by what had transpired during lunch. By the girl who thought herself invincible.

_Two weeks max?_ Fucking insane.

He did his best to keep the ire from leaking into his voice; he had been controlling his boiling rage ever since she had come downstairs with Sasha's help to have lunch with them—he could wait a few more minutes until they were alone. "Can you walk?"

She nodded, a determined glint in her dark eyes. With Eren's support, Mikasa managed the stairs without too much effort. The pill she had just taken was gradually numbing the spasms of pain in her chest, and although she detested the thought of relying on such a substance for pain relief, she knew that just biting the bullet and bearing with the pain would be counterproductive.

As soon as they had shuffled into the room and closed the door behind them, Eren rounded to face her, prepared to chew her out. But before he could even open his mouth, Mikasa launched herself at him, throwing both arms around his neck and nearly knocking both of them over. He grunted in surprise but quickly steadied them both by gripping her waist in return. He was about to ask why she was clutching onto him like he was her lifeline when he realized with alarm that she was trembling. He tentatively moved his hands to pat her back.

"Mikasa? What's the matter?"

He felt her shake her head as she pressed herself closer to him. Suppressing an exasperated sigh, Eren tried to pull away as her hair tickled his face but to no avail. It's not that he didn't like the contact per se, but she was nearly choking him and that wasn't exactly a pleasant feeling. Besides, she really shouldn't be exerting herself like this when her body was in no shape to do so. "Mikasa, your ribs—"

"You're safe." She breathed, so quietly that he almost didn't catch it. Mikasa slightly leaned back then to look at him, giving him a thorough once over before cracking a gentle smile. "You're all healed. I'm so relieved, Eren."

The gray-eyed boy blinked rapidly as he looked into her smiling eyes, and suddenly his throat felt parched and he could actually feel the anger physically draining from him. What had he wanted to say again? After a few more seconds of staring, he managed an unintelligible, "Uh, yeah." Clearing the fog shrouding his mind with a shake, Eren hastily turned his attention to the task at hand. "Come on, let's get you to bed."

Allowing him to lead the way, Mikasa couldn't keep the small smile off her face. She gingerly sat herself down on the bed and let him pull the covers over her crossed legs. When he made to sit on the wooden chair by the bed, she grabbed his hand and patted the spot on the bed before her. "Sit with me."

Considering her request for a few seconds, Eren acquiesced and silently inspected her face after settling down. She appeared to be in a much better mood than she had been downstairs; there was even a faint glow on her cheeks. "How are you feeling?"

"Don't worry about me." She reassured him. "I'll recover in no time."

Right, that's what he had been bothered about. "Two weeks isn't enough time to recover." Clenching his jaw, Eren shot her his best stern look.

"It will be." Mikasa stated matter-of-factly. When he opened his mouth to protest, she reached over and encased both of hands in her own, effectively halting him. "What about you?"

He tried not to be distracted by the fact that her hands were still so soft despite the callouses from hours of sword training. How was he feeling? It was a loaded question that really shouldn't be so difficult for a fifteen-year-old to answer. But then again, he wasn't just any fifteen-year-old. Eren shrugged and began slowly, "I'm physically fine…no lasting after-effects this time." He fell silent then, and Mikasa patiently waited for the inevitable _but_. His mouth was firmly set, and his silver eyes were swimming with conflicting emotions that reflected his internal war with his thoughts. Seconds passed by without any elaborating from him and just as she was about to speak up, he suddenly wrenched his hands away to fist his dark locks, his head bowed in a universal sign of distress.

Alarmed, Mikasa urgently placed her hands on his shoulders. "Eren? What's wrong? Are you hurting?"

The boy shrugged her hands away and turned his body to face the window, scooting towards the foot of the bed when her hands immediately reached for him again. Sadly dropping her arms, she took in his slumped and defeated posture and wanted nothing more than to embrace him. But she knew all too well that when he was on the verge of exploding, he would just push her away.

"Yes, it fucking hurts." He spat out viciously, still refusing to look at her. His fury was back with a vengeance. "It makes me so angry when I think about those traitors, _murderers_, that are still out there somewhere. And it makes me angrier when I'm reminded of the fact that I wasn't capable of stopping them. It kills me every time I think about all of the people I have failed. All of the people who died because of me. All of the people who are permanently disabled because of me—the commander…" He shook his head rapidly. "All of the people I couldn't save—" His voice cracked then, and she watched an angry tear slide down his left cheek. Mikasa's heart ached at the sight of him breaking down, and she was about to just throw caution to the wind and close the distance between them when he stopped her with his next words. "And even you. This isn't the first time you've gotten hurt because of me."

Her hand flew up on its own accord to trace the scar under her right eye. "Eren, it's not your fault." She made her voice as soothing as possible.

His head whipped around then, his expression a cross between incredulity and rage. "Why do you always fucking say that? It _is_ my fault, it's _always_ my fault."

"It's out of your control. You've done nothing wrong." She offered him a half-smile that he harshly scowled at.

"No, you don't understand." His tone was overflowing with frustration. "I can never do anything right. Couldn't do a single fucking thing back _then_, and still can't do a single fucking thing now. The whole damn human race is depending on someone like _me_? All I've done is sent them to their deaths!" A short, mirthless chuckle escaped from his lips.

"That's not true." Mikasa insisted firmly. "You've gone from being unable to control your shifting power to instantly transforming on the spot. We managed to capture Annie because of you. You have come a long way, Eren, so don't say that you can't do anything."

"But it's not enough." He retorted vehemently. "There's still so much that I don't know. You saw it for yourself yesterday—it seems like I can somehow _control_ Titans or something, and don't ask me how because I don't have an answer. I'm still trying to wrap my head around this concept that just seems fucking impossible, and I wonder if it's reliable or if there's a limit to it. I just—I don't know!" His hands dove back into his hair. "So many people have died…Jean said that it's up to me to make sure that they didn't die in vain, and fuck, he's _right_. But what the hell am I supposed to do? I'm responsible for all of those lost lives, and I don't even have a single fucking clue how my power will even help the human race, let alone save it. I'm—I'm a _monster_." That one word embodied all of the pain, guilt, and shame that had accumulated over time since the discovery of his shifting ability months ago.

"Then so am I." She said simply as she looked down at her hands. His sharp intake of breath indicated that he was listening. He was suddenly experiencing a flashback, back to the trial held after the Battle of Trost and before his induction into the Survey Corps.

_"I may be a monster, but Mikasa has nothing to do with it!"_

What was she saying?

Her eyes remained glued to her wringing hands. "I have been willing to get rid of anyone who stands in my way. I have abandoned comrades to their fate for my own selfish reasons. Since that day six years ago, when I first used a knife with the intent to kill, I have not once regretted it. I have learned that when you hesitate, you lose." When he just gaped at her, she continued, noticeably less tonelessly and more cautiously. "Last night, the painkillers allowed me to sleep well. I woke up briefly at around dawn, and when I went back to sleep again…" She trailed off then, an ominous shadow crossing her face. By the way she appeared to be struggling with her next words, Eren knew that this was important. He turned his body towards her again, this action showing that she had his full attention.

"I dreamed—I saw my mom. It was _that_ day. It's been years since she last appeared in my dreams, but my memory of that day was always vivid." Eren felt his breath leave him. In all of the years he had known her, she had never once said more than one word about her parents. Her face was carefully masked to appear neutral, but he just knew that this was eating her on the inside. "And then, the scene changed and I saw…your mom." He froze, trying to comprehend what she had just said. The two of them just didn't talk about their parents; it was an extremely sensitive topic that neither of them had broached in a long time.

He didn't want to tread in these dangerous waters; he didn't even want to touch a drop of it. But before he could think it through, his mouth was moving on its own. "Was it..." _That _day? Fighting down the panic, he clamped his mouth shut, unable to coherently finish his question.

Mikasa knew exactly what he was asking. She nodded and finally lifted her eyes to meet his. The naked pain and terror swirling in her dark orbs shocked him. Her façade crumbled then, and a lone tear cascaded down her right cheek. "And then I saw Mr. Hannes. They were all smiling when they first appeared and then—" Her voice faltered and her body shuddered violently as she curled her legs up to her chest.

In any other situation, he would have been amazed by just how vulnerable and _human_ she could be. But his chest was feeling strangely tight and it felt like all of the air had been sucked out of the room. Without another moment's hesitation, Eren situated himself closer to her on his knees and wrapped his arms around her shaking form, pulling her into his chest. She responded immediately, her hands fisting around the fabric of his shirt and face pressed against his chest as her silent tears fell. Running his fingers through her hair comfortingly, he could feel hot tears prickling his eyes but refused to shed them. When one of them was crying, the other should stay strong. He was often the former, and she the latter—so during this rare occurrence of swapped roles, he would do his best to be the pillar of support for her as she always was for him. In passing, he wondered just how it had gone from him spontaneously exploding to her crying, but he was grateful that they had each other during times like this; he felt significantly better just letting it all out, even though nothing had changed.

He suddenly realized that he had never held her like this before. They had shared a few embraces in the past, just enough to probably count on two hands, but none of them were like this. This felt intimate, in a way that he couldn't quite put into words. Their relationship had progressed during the past couple of months and become something that he couldn't label; all he knew for certain was that she was the most important person in his life. The events that had transpired just yesterday confirmed it—he couldn't bear the thought of losing her, and ensuring that she survived had been his priority in that dire situation. He wasn't sure if this meant that he loved her in _that_ sense though…just what kind of love did she feel anyways?

He was digressing. Sudden movement from the girl in his arms drew him out of his thoughts. Moving back to look at him, Mikasa gave him a tiny watery smile. "Thank you."

"Don't thank me for such trivial things." There was a hint of annoyance in his tone, but the slightly embarrassed expression on his face revealed his true feelings.

Her smile widened before she grew serious, her gaze abruptly concerned. "Eren, I don't think you've ever properly grieved for the people we have lost. I'm here if you ever need to cry or just talk about it, you know."

He adamantly shook his head—he definitely didn't want to go there. "There will be time to grieve once this is all over…but not now. It wouldn't mean anything to do it now anyways." Once he had destroyed all of the Titans, once he had reached the basement, once he had avenged all of the unjustified deaths.

Frowning, Mikasa appeared to want to argue but winced at that exact moment as a streak of pain coursed through her chest. Anxious, Eren briskly pulled away and slid off the bed. "I think it's time for you to rest." He cautiously helped her lie down and tucked in the blankets around her. "I'll see you later, okay?" Giving her one last look, he turned away, only to feel her grab his hand. He twisted around to look at her questioningly.

"Did you mean what you said then?" Her eyes locked with his and didn't waver in the slightest.

Then? He cocked his head to the side, unsure what she was referring to. To his mild amusement, she flushed and averted her gaze. "About the scarf…"

_Oh_. It was his turn to feel uncomfortably warm.

She deserved the truth. He bent down to gently caress the scarf he had given her many years ago. "I meant every word."

Her response was by far the most dazzling smile to date, and she squeezed his hand once before releasing it and closing her eyes with a satisfied sigh. He watched her for a few more seconds, his eyes involuntarily zeroing in on the scar that would forever serve as a reminder of his sins. Releasing a shaky breath, he belatedly realized that this was rather creepy of him—something that horse-face would probably do, but not him. No, Eren Yeager was above those who were content to watch others sleep. Hastily spinning around, he was halfway across the room when she whispered those three words.

He paused and swallowed thickly, prepared to murmur his customary response. But what came out instead was a stuttered, "Me—I know."

What the fuck?

Bolting out of the room, he closed the door behind him and replayed what had just happened in his mind, his heart hammering in his chest for whatever reason. Had his initial reaction really been to say "me too"? Shit, he was in trouble.

The gray-eyed boy jumped at the unexpected sound of someone climbing the stairs. Peering down from the top, he found himself looking at the horse-face.

Jean was unimpressed. "The Lance Corporal told me to check on you because you were taking so long."

Slightly sheepish, Eren scratched the back of his neck. "We just talked for a bit, but she's resting now."

The lighter-haired boy's eyes narrowed, and his lips curled up in what was the start of a sneer before he abruptly whirled around and descended down the stairs. Irritated by Jean's unwarranted attitude, Eren followed and picked up his pace, cutting in front of him to block the path to the dining room. "What's your problem? I don't know what I did to deserve all of those hostile looks you give me."

Jean crossed his arms and glared down at the shorter boy. "I don't know what she sees in you."

Eren arched a confused brow at that. "Who?"

"Mikasa, you idiot!" Jean huffed in exasperation and then continued half-angrily half-bitterly, "She's always willing to risk her life for you, so don't you dare get yourself captured like that again if you don't want her to suffer the consequences."

His first thought was to lash out in retaliation, but what was the point in doing so when the guy hadn't said anything wrong? Fuck, he hated this—when had _Jean_ become the voice of reason? "I know." Clenching his fists, Eren grimaced and then sighed, struggling with his pride as he carefully said his next words. "I never got the chance to say this, so thank you. For saving her when I couldn't."

Speechless, Jean floundered like a fish out of the water, wondering if the boy in front of him had really just thanked him for the second time within the span of twenty-four hours. When seconds passed and Eren's sincere expression hadn't morphed into a mocking smirk, Jean uncomfortably shifted his weight and cleared his throat before gruffly nodding.

When he wasn't being an ass riling up a particular Titan shifter, Jean was actually a decent guy. Eren silently admitted to himself that he had known for a long while now that amongst all of them, he was probably the most qualified to save Mikasa in the event Eren couldn't do it himself. Of course, Armin had been the first to cross his mind. But while Armin was clever enough to escape a situation with words, if it were to come down to a physical confrontation, the blond wouldn't easily prevail. On the other hand, Jean was logical in his own way and had the build to engage in an offensive attack. Where Armin was a fast thinker, Jean had fast reflexes.

Having said all that he had cared to reveal and wounded his pride enough, Eren made to turn away then, but stopped when the other boy spoke up. "About what the Lance Corporal said during lunch…what do you think he means?" There was a nervous hitch in his voice that he failed to conceal.

Glancing behind him warily, Eren shrugged half-heartedly. In a rare moment of camaraderie, they exchanged looks that were filled with uncertainty, doubt, and fear.

* * *

The rest of the afternoon passed by rather uneventfully. Half of the new squad members scrubbed the bathroom while the other half cleaned every nook and cranny of their dining room. Unfortunately, Levi assigned Connie and Sasha to different groups, so there weren't any entertaining pranks for the others to witness. When the sun was low in the sky, the Lance Corporal formed the dinner crew, which consisted of Armin, Jean, Sasha, and himself. Naturally, Levi had deemed it wise for him to be in the kitchen to supervise and make sure that the food hoarder didn't steal any of their limited provisions.

Eren had hoped to be able to talk to Armin about his current predicament involving a certain black-haired girl, but an opportunity to do so had yet to present itself; they had been placed in different cleaning groups, and the blond was sent directly into the kitchen after. This left Eren, Connie, and Historia to resume their chores. They worked without conversation for another half an hour before Eren decided that he had had enough. The Titan shifter stood up from where he had been scrubbing on his knees and looked over at the other two, who were both still cleaning their respective areas without a sound, perhaps lost in their own thoughts. Both of them were harboring secrets, and he was getting to the point where he could no longer contain his curiosity.

"You're both awfully quiet." Eren remarked as he switched his attention from one to the other. When he only received glances and no verbal response, he tousled his hair in aggravation. Turning to Historia first, he bluntly asked the question that everyone else seemed to have been skirting around. "Are you going to tell us what you've been hiding?"

From out the corner of his eye, he noticed Connie halt and incline his head in the blonde girl's direction—an obvious sign that he was just as interested in her answer. Historia stayed still with her back to them for a few more moments before she dropped the rag in hand and slowly turned to meet their expectant gazes.

When their eyes locked, Eren offered an explanation. "Since we're in the same squad, we should be honest with each other. You're somehow a part of this giant mystery now, so it should only be right for you to share what you know."

The girl blinked at him and then dropped her eyes to the ground, remaining silent. He had been hoping for an affirmative response, but at least it appeared that she was mulling over his words. Eren looked over at the other boy in the room then. Wide-eyed, Connie stared back.

"I know what you're going to ask me." The boy with the shaved head groaned. "But I really don't know what's going on either…it's what happened in my village and I just—" Breaking off, Connie shuddered as he seemed to remember something unpleasant and shook his head vigorously. "I don't want to talk about it…not until I find out more about it myself."

That only piqued Eren's interest even more, but the Titan shifter decided that it would be best to leave it at that for the time being. He wasn't going to be able to force anything out of either of them yet. A sharp intake of breath had all three pairs of eyes snapping over to dining room entrance, where an unexpected person was leaning heavily against the doorframe.

"Mikasa!" Her name spilled from his lips in stark surprise, and he was in front of her the next instant. "Why are you up? Shit, did you come downstairs all by yourself? Are you okay?"

She wasn't out of breath but she also wasn't in tip-top shape either; there was a light sheen of perspiration coating her forehead, and the way she was relying on the doorframe to keep her posture was more than enough indication of the strain placed on her body as a result of her actions. Nevertheless, she was still sporting a healthy glow, so that was a relief.

_"Me—I know."_

Feeling flustered as he recalled the last thing he had said to her, he quickly looked away from her and instead offered his assistance. Accepting his proffered hand, she allowed him to help her over to the table and felt the corner of her lips tug upwards when he even pulled the chair out for her. "I'm managing. I can at least have my meals with everyone; lying in bed all day won't do me any good."

Eren was about to counter that lying in bed was exactly what resting meant when Sasha suddenly bounded out of the kitchen and beamed at them. "Dinner's ready!" Her eyes fell onto the injured girl. "Ah, Mikasa! You're feeling well enough to eat with us?"

The girl in question nodded, and Sasha clapped her hands together gleefully. Levi walked into the room holding two trays of food, one in each hand, and set them down onto the table. He gestured over to the kitchen. "Since we cooked, the rest of you can at the very least fetch your own trays."

Balancing his own tray, Jean was the next to appear as Eren, Connie, and Historia filed into the kitchen. "Mikasa, are you alright?"

She nodded again—she was grateful to know that people were concerned about her condition, but she wasn't a porcelain doll. Far from it. Levi was pinning her with a calculating look, but said nothing about her presence.

When everyone had situated himself or herself around the table, the Lance Corporal picked up his spoon and dinner commenced. The silence that settled over them wasn't uncomfortable and was even welcomed; everyone was hungry after a few hours of hardcore cleaning. They were only about ten minutes into the meal when Historia suddenly broke the silence, stunning everyone as she had yet to say more than two words since setting foot into the cabin. Her eyes were downcast, and her tone was solemn.

"I was born on a small farm in the northern part of Wall Sina."

* * *

**Some EreMika development, a few interactions among the members of our new squad, and Historia is finally revealing her identity! On a different note, did you guys hear about an upcoming collaboration between Marvel Comics and our beloved series?! The only thing I possibly love just as much as SnK is Marvel (Spiderman, the Avengers, love them all!), so this is basically the best news I have heard in my entire life. I'm also so ready for this month's chapter...after that plot twist a part of me saw coming but shocked me anyways, a part of this giant mystery is finally revealed!**


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